Hey Doc,

This episode is a plea.

Please take care of yourself.

There has been a lot of loss in the physician community lately, and it has made me take a harder look at the care I’m giving myself too.

Because I can preach about putting yourself first all day long, but meanwhile my Peloton has basically become furniture and my eating habits have been…questionable. 😂

And it reminded me that taking care of ourselves isn’t one thing.

You can exercise regularly and be struggling mentally.

You can eat well and be completely unsupported at home.

You can go to therapy and still be working in a job that is slowly destroying you.

You can look incredibly functional from the outside while barely keeping your head above water.

Physicians are particularly good at that last one.

We are trained to keep going. Sometimes we’re outright praised for ignoring what our bodies and minds are telling us because patients need us, there’s nobody to cover the shift, and somebody has to get the work done.

Then many of us become mothers and bring that same conditioning home.

In this episode, I’m sharing part of a previous conversation from the Mom & Mind podcast about physician burnout, anxiety, sleep deprivation, motherhood, and why asking for help is one of the most important skills we can develop.

We talk about:

• Why some of the qualities that make us excellent physicians can make anxiety harder to recognize
• The medical culture that teaches us to push through even when we’re physically or mentally unwell
• Why sleep and support matter so much during the postpartum years
• The belief that we should be able to handle everything ourselves
• Why asking for help isn’t limited to hiring someone. Family, friends, neighbors, therapy, coaching, and community all count
• What it means when your current life simply does not allow you to adequately care for yourself

You deserve help. You deserve rest. You deserve care and support.

And if taking care of yourself feels impossible within the life you’re currently living, I want you to seriously consider what needs to change.

Because life is too short, Doc.

Listen to the episode. And then check in with yourself, for real.

What did you think of the episode, doc? Let me know!

Subscribe to ✨Stethoscopes and Strollers✨ on your favorite podcast platform so you never miss an episode.

Apple Podcast | Spotify | YouTube

Connect with me: Website | Instagram | Facebook

Join my Email list to get tips on navigating motherhood in the medical field.

If you are going through a transition -- becoming a parent, leaving a job, figuring out how manage it all, schedule a strategy coaching session and get clarity and strategic next steps for the life and career you want.

Strategy Coaching Session with Dr. Toya

Hey Doc,

These children will really have you questioning your entire motherhood résumé.

This summer, I left my kids in Trinidad with their grandparents while my husband and I stayed home to work on our businesses. And before you come for me, please understand the setup: camp, personal transportation, loving grandparents, extra help, someone cooking for them, and my mother making my son fry bake on request.

This child was living GOOD.

And yet, my son was crying, telling me he hated camp and wanted to come home. It was hard to hear, even when I had photographic evidence that he was perfectly happy when he wasn’t on the phone with me.

Then, a few weeks later, I told him we were coming to get them.

His response?

He didn’t want to come home.

Sir.

In this episode of Stethoscopes and Strollers, I’m talking about what happens when your child’s very real feelings start making you question whether you’ve made a terrible parenting decision.

Because your child can be sad.

They can miss you.

They can cry.

They can even be absolutely furious about a decision you made.

And none of those things automatically mean you made the wrong decision.

Sometimes being their mother means trusting what you know, allowing them to have their feelings, and resisting the urge to immediately fix their discomfort just so you can stop feeling guilty.

I’m sharing what this experience taught me about motherhood, guilt, and sticking with a decision even when your child is giving an Oscar-worthy performance suggesting you have personally ruined their life.

Spoiler: mine went from crying himself to sleep to asking when he could come back to Trinidad.

There’s hope for you, Doc. 😂

🎧 Listen to the full episode of Stethoscopes and Strollers.

What did you think of the episode, doc? Let me know!

Subscribe to ✨Stethoscopes and Strollers✨ on your favorite podcast platform so you never miss an episode.

Apple Podcast | Spotify | YouTube

Connect with me: Website | Instagram | Facebook

Join my Email list to get tips on navigating motherhood in the medical field.

If you are going through a transition -- becoming a parent, leaving a job, figuring out how manage it all, schedule a strategy coaching session and get clarity and strategic next steps for the life and career you want.

Strategy Coaching Session with Dr. Toya

Hey, Doc

I'm sharing part of an interview I did on my friend Dr. Weili Gray's podcast, *The Dare to Dream Physician Travel Podcast*. At the time, she had just pivoted her show to focus on travel, and listening back now feels like opening a time capsule.

We talk about my journey from Trinidad to Howard University, residency, burnout, entrepreneurship, and coaching. But we also talk about one of my greatest passions: travel.

From solo trips through South Africa... to scuba diving on the Great Barrier Reef... to standing inside the slave castles in Ghana while pregnant with my son... this conversation reminded me how much travel has shaped who I am.

But the most surprising moment came near the end.

I casually said, "I haven't really traveled that much."

Then I started listing the places I'd been.

Twenty-two countries.

Five countries in Africa.

Australia. Greece. Turkey. The Seychelles. Botswana. Ghana.

I realized, in real time, that my brain had been telling me a story that simply wasn't true.

That's what this episode is really about.

The stories we believe about ourselves.

In this episode, we talk about:
- Why I started traveling alone during residency
- My love affair with the African continent
- The emotional experience of visiting Ghana and the slave castles
- How scuba diving became one of my favorite adventures
- Why I don't wait for other people before living my life
- The surprising lie I realized I'd been telling myself
- Why coaching and community help us see ourselves more clearly

One of the biggest reasons we stay stuck is because we believe our own thoughts without questioning them.

Sometimes all it takes is saying them out loud for someone else to hold up a mirror and say, "Wait a minute... that's not actually true."

That's the power of community.

That's the power of coaching.

And sometimes, that's the power of a podcast conversation.

🎧 Listen in, get to know me a little better, and maybe you'll catch one of the stories you've been telling yourself, too.

What did you think of the episode, doc? Let me know!

Subscribe to ✨Stethoscopes and Strollers✨ on your favorite podcast platform so you never miss an episode.

Apple Podcast | Spotify | YouTube

Connect with me: Website | Instagram | Facebook

Join my Email list to get tips on navigating motherhood in the medical field.

If you are going through a transition -- becoming a parent, leaving a job, figuring out how manage it all, schedule a strategy coaching session and get clarity and strategic next steps for the life and career you want.

Strategy Coaching Session with Dr. Toya

Hey Doc

You worked incredibly hard to become a physician. Four years of undergrad. Four years of medical school. Years of residency and fellowship. Endless sacrifices.

So why are you acting like you're not allowed to benefit from it?

In this episode, I'm giving you full permission to use one of the few privileges you truly earned: your physician network.

I've used it to get second opinions when my family needed them. I've gotten my nephew seen by a pediatric subspecialist on short notice. I've leaned on physician communities when my mom had a serious burn. Every single time, someone stepped up because I asked.

And that's the part many of us forget.

People actually want to help.

Somewhere along the way, many physician moms start believing they're bothering people if they reach out, ask a question, or call in a favor. We spend our careers taking care of everyone else but hesitate to let anyone take care of us.

I'm here to remind you that this isn't taking advantage of anyone.

This is one of the few privileges you worked your entire adult life to earn.

Use it.

In this episode, we talk about:

• Why physician moms often hesitate to ask for help
• Real examples of how I've used my physician network for my family
• The surprising truth: helping others feels good
• Why asking for help is a gift to the person who's able to give it
• How to stop feeling guilty about using the connections you've earned

You don't have to wait months for an appointment if someone is willing to help. You don't have to feel guilty texting a specialist friend. You don't have to do this alone.

Use your privilege, Doc.

You've earned it.

🎧 Listen now, and if this episode reminds you of another physician who needs permission to ask for help, send it to her. She deserves to use the network she worked so hard to build, too.

What did you think of the episode, doc? Let me know!

Subscribe to ✨Stethoscopes and Strollers✨ on your favorite podcast platform so you never miss an episode.

Apple Podcast | Spotify | YouTube

Connect with me: Website | Instagram | Facebook

Join my Email list to get tips on navigating motherhood in the medical field.

If you are going through a transition -- becoming a parent, leaving a job, figuring out how manage it all, schedule a strategy coaching session and get clarity and strategic next steps for the life and career you want.

Strategy Coaching Session with Dr. Toya

Hey Doc,

I’m back with another episode where I was dropping gems on another podcast.

I joined Dr. Diane Shannon on Vital Signs: Thriving as a Woman in Medicine to talk about something I think sits at the heart of so much burnout for physician moms: the definition of a "good mom."

Most of us inherited that definition without ever questioning it. Be there for everything. Do it yourself. Put everyone else's needs ahead of your own. Sacrifice without complaint.

The problem? That model was never built for women practicing medicine.

Medicine still rewards self-sacrifice. Motherhood often expects it. Put those two together, and it's no surprise so many physician moms feel like they're failing at both, even when they're doing an extraordinary job.

In this conversation, we unpack where these expectations come from, why physician moms experience them so intensely, and how creating your own definition of motherhood isn't selfish. It's necessary.

We also talk about the practical changes that can help you protect your wellbeing without sacrificing the career or family you've worked so hard to build.

In this episode, we discuss:

• Why the traditional idea of the "good mom" sets physician moms up for burnout
• How medicine's culture of martyrdom amplifies guilt at home and at work
• The hidden costs of trying to do everything yourself
• Why redefining motherhood is one of the most important mindset shifts you can make
• Practical ways to prioritize yourself without feeling guilty

If you've ever felt like you're constantly falling short, despite giving everything you have, I hope this conversation reminds you that the problem isn't you.

It might just be the definition you've been trying to live up to.

🎧 Press play and let's redefine what being a good mom really means.

What did you think of the episode, doc? Let me know!

Subscribe to ✨Stethoscopes and Strollers✨ on your favorite podcast platform so you never miss an episode.

Apple Podcast | Spotify | YouTube

Connect with me: Website | Instagram | Facebook

Join my Email list to get tips on navigating motherhood in the medical field.

If you are going through a transition -- becoming a parent, leaving a job, figuring out how manage it all, schedule a strategy coaching session and get clarity and strategic next steps for the life and career you want.

Strategy Coaching Session with Dr. Toya

One conversation can change your career. But first, you have to be willing to ask.

In this episode, I'm joined by my friend Dr. Kristine Goins on The Physician's Guide to Doctoring to talk about one of my favorite topics: asking.

Whether you're negotiating your contract, requesting a different schedule, asking for support at home, or advocating for yourself in medicine, the biggest obstacle usually isn't strategy. It's believing you're allowed to ask in the first place.

We talk about why physicians are conditioned to avoid asking, how to move through the fear of hearing "no," and why connecting to what you actually want changes every negotiation.

In this episode, we discuss:

• Why asking is a skill every physician needs
• How medical culture teaches us to silence our own needs
• Reframing "no" as information instead of rejection
• The role of curiosity in successful negotiation
• Why your deepest desire matters more than negotiation scripts
• How to know if you're asking for enough
• A real example of negotiating a locums incentive by honoring your own value

A quick heads-up: Parts of this recording were unfortunately corrupted, and AI replaced portions of my voice during the editing process. It sounds a little strange in a few spots, but the conversation was too valuable not to share. Thanks for sticking with it.

If this episode makes you realize you've been settling for less than you need, I hope it reminds you that asking isn't selfish. It's a skill. And it's one worth practicing.

What did you think of the episode, doc? Let me know!

Subscribe to ✨Stethoscopes and Strollers✨ on your favorite podcast platform so you never miss an episode.

Apple Podcast | Spotify | YouTube

Connect with me: Website | Instagram | Facebook

Join my Email list to get tips on navigating motherhood in the medical field.

If you are going through a transition -- becoming a parent, leaving a job, figuring out how manage it all, schedule a strategy coaching session and get clarity and strategic next steps for the life and career you want.

Strategy Coaching Session with Dr. Toya

Hey Doc—

One of the questions I've been asked the most over the past few months is, "Why did you leave medicine?"

The short answer is: I didn't leave medicine to do something else.

I left clinical practice because I found another way to serve physician moms.

In this episode, I share the story behind that decision, why coaching became my second calling, and why stepping away from practicing as an OB/GYN wasn't about walking away from patients. It was about expanding the impact I could have by helping physician moms build lives they actually enjoy living.

When a physician mom finds her voice, strengthens her marriage, leads with confidence, creates support at home, and rediscovers herself, the ripple effect reaches her family, her colleagues, and every patient she cares for.

That's why this work matters so much to me.

In this episode, we discuss:

• The real reason I stepped away from clinical medicine
• Why coaching physician moms became my life's work
• How supporting one physician mom creates a ripple effect far beyond one family
• Why I believe this work is an extension of medicine, not a departure from it
• What it means to find a second calling without letting go of the first

Looking back, I don't think I had two separate careers. I've always been committed to helping women thrive. The way I do that has changed, but the mission hasn't.

🎧 Listen now, and if you've ever wondered what happens when your purpose evolves, I hope this episode gives you a glimpse into mine.

What did you think of the episode, doc? Let me know!

Subscribe to ✨Stethoscopes and Strollers✨ on your favorite podcast platform so you never miss an episode.

Apple Podcast | Spotify | YouTube

Connect with me: Website | Instagram | Facebook

Join my Email list to get tips on navigating motherhood in the medical field.

If you are going through a transition -- becoming a parent, leaving a job, figuring out how manage it all, schedule a strategy coaching session and get clarity and strategic next steps for the life and career you want.

Strategy Coaching Session with Dr. Toya

Hey Doc—

Welcome back to Part 2 of this conversation.

In Part 1, we talked about why so many physician moms end up exhausted, overwhelmed, and questioning whether this is simply what motherhood and medicine are supposed to feel like.

In this episode, we shift to what comes next.

We talk about the beliefs many of us carry into motherhood without ever examining them, why trying to do everything yourself often leads to resentment, and the practical shifts that allow physician moms to thrive without complete self-sacrifice.

From building a village to strengthening your marriage to putting yourself back on your own priority list, this conversation is about creating a version of motherhood that supports your life instead of consuming it.

In this episode, we discuss:

• Why you need to define motherhood based on your own values
• The myth that good mothers should do everything themselves
• How building a village creates stronger families, not weaker mothers
• Why investing in your marriage benefits everyone in your home
• How prioritizing yourself makes you a better physician, partner, and mother

Medicine teaches us to put everyone else first. Motherhood often reinforces the same message. It's no surprise so many physician moms feel like they're disappearing in the process.

My hope is that this conversation helps you think differently about what thriving can look like—and reminds you that you get to build a life that fits you.

🎧 Listen now, and if this episode made you think of another physician mom, send it her way.

What did you think of the episode, doc? Let me know!

Subscribe to ✨Stethoscopes and Strollers✨ on your favorite podcast platform so you never miss an episode.

Apple Podcast | Spotify | YouTube

Connect with me: Website | Instagram | Facebook

Join my Email list to get tips on navigating motherhood in the medical field.

If you are going through a transition -- becoming a parent, leaving a job, figuring out how manage it all, schedule a strategy coaching session and get clarity and strategic next steps for the life and career you want.

Strategy Coaching Session with Dr. Toya