Epic Fantasy Humor

Piers Anthony delivers another tale set in the best-selling world of Xanth, filled with magic, surprises, adventure, and a few puns. Here's what the author has to say about his new book: "Five Portraits is a kind of sequel to Board Stiff in that it picks up where the other leaves off, with the same characters. Apart from that, it's one of my favorites within the series.

This is a collection of the second six short stories in the Caverns and Creatures series.

Going back home was not exactly what Tim and the C&C gang expected. Trouble continues to follow them back to Gulf Coast Mississippi. Trouble...and a gnome...and an undead midget.

Waldo and company arrive looking for information. What they find is a suspicious mage guild, a delusional queen, an entire city awash in greed and deception, and an old acquaintance who is very happy to see him again. Getting the information he's looking for won't be easy, but when has that ever stopped Waldo?

Jaron and Bren are a pair of roguish adventurers only hoping for one big score. Unfortunately, things never work out that easy. Whether facing packs of hungry goblins, armies of marauding orcs, malevolent cults, or even the mythical Galackin, the odds always seem to be stacked against this intrepid duo. This is a collection of 10 fantasy flash fiction stories, each with a comedic bent. Fans of the Discworld will enjoy the situational humor, while lovers of traditional fantasy will enjoy seeing common fantasy tropes in a different light.

In Xanth, everyone has a talent. But that doesn't mean everyone loves his talent, and no one understands that better than Hapless. Endowed with the ability to conjure any instrument he wants, Hapless could be an extraordinary musician if only he could play a tune that didn't fall ear-piercingly flat. His one desire is to find an instrument he can play. When the Good Magician hears about Hapless's desperate desire, he sends the young man on a quest to find the elusive Isis Orb, a magical talisman that could fulfill his wish.

Waldo's on the run again. He escapes Melissa's grasp but is marked by her Death Seal. What is there to do but keep going forward? Follow Waldo, Alice, and Gronk as they deal with spies, smugglers, and giant monsters. Meanwhile, Melissa has problems of her own back in Torikai. While in the land of Dark Mages, Lilith begins putting her plans into action. Waldo finds himself in a port city with no one willing to take him and his party where he needs to go. Just what will he have to do to get passage? If you're desperate enough, you can always find someone willing to make a deal.

All Lex wanted was to help his good buddy Gryph find his sister and maybe save the world along the way. But everything goes wrong from the start when Lex gets separated from Gryph during their transfer into the Realms. Lost, alone, and forced to live the same day over and over, Lex must defeat the agent of a despotic god, uncover hidden truths about himself, and find his way back to his friend. If he fails the Realms face destruction.

Witness the epic battle of the cyclops! Visit the endangered dragon preserve! Please, no slaying. Solve the mystery of The Mystery Cottage, if you dare! Buy some knickknacks from The Fates! They might come in handy later. On a road trip across an enchanted America, Helen and Troy will discover all this and more. If the curse placed upon them by an ancient god doesn't kill them or the pack of reluctant orc assassins don't catch up to them, Helen and Troy might reach the end their journey in one piece, where they might just end up destroying the world.

Milton Frederick was arguably the best player of Crowned Lieges of Destiny in the entire world. As the strategy coordinator for one of the top guilds, he was beginning to actually make a living from it. That was, until he was abducted by aliens. Severely damaged and confused about what happened to him, he woke up to find himself trapped inside a massive chicken egg on a strange, primitive world filled with curious - and deadly - creatures. Now, in order to survive, Milton has to rely on a snarky, foul-mouthed AI guide to show him what it means to be a Station Core.

Max's coworkers treat him like hot garbage, and his manager is a superficial dolt. Unfortunately for him, his fate was sealed before he was even born and it's way worse than working part-time in a coffee shop. Confronted out of the blue by a floating demonic eye, Max doesn't take it seriously, because who would? So when the flesh is ripped from his bones and he's hurled, screaming, into a fantastic and terrifying new world, he's a little surprised. When he learns his task is to free the daughter of the god of death who's been chained and tortured for centuries, he is stunned.

"Guxx Unfufadoo is my name. And killing wizards is my game!" Thus spoke the dreaded rhyming demon, come from the Netherhells, to munch a bunch of the great Ebenezum. Only it didn't quite work out that way. Ebenezum lived, cursed by Guxx with a mighty curse that he should henceforth be allergic to magic. So Ebenezum and his hapless apprentice Wuntvor must journey to the City of Forbidden Delights to seek a cure.

Veranix Calbert leads a double life. By day, he’s a struggling magic student at the University of Maradaine. At night, he spoils the drug trade of Willem Fenmere, crime boss of Dentonhill and murderer of Veranix’s father. He’s determined to shut Fenmere down. With that goal in mind, Veranix disrupts the delivery of two magical artifacts meant for Fenmere's clients, the mages of the Blue Hand Circle. Using these power-filled objects in his fight, he quickly becomes a real thorn in Fenmere's side.

The struggle to get into a top-tier college consumes 16-year-old Genie's every waking thought. But when she discovers she's a celestial spirit who's powerful enough to bash through the gates of heaven with her fists, her perfectionist existence is shattered. Enter Quentin, a transfer student from China whose tone-deaf assertiveness beguiles Genie to the brink of madness. Quentin nurtures Genie's bodacious transformation - sometimes gently, sometimes aggressively - as her sleepy suburb in the Bay Area comes under siege from hell spawn.

Murland Kadabra has always dreamed of becoming a great wizard. However, at age 19, the young apprentice has yet to successfully cast a single spell. He has been reduced to grounds keeper of Abra Tower, and has become the laughing stock of the wizarding school. But when the Most High Wizard Kazimir chooses him to be one of the five Champions of the Dragon, Murland's life changes forever.

Introducing the Wixy Witches, this tale of many tales is an allegory like Alice or Oz, lampooning fairytales, the fantasy genre, and status brands. Set in the early fifteenth century, the orphaned Wixy quintuplets evade Florence’s witch hunters, as alchemist Bolinbard Hargmond flees plague with his wife and son Rebicus, heading for Draxenland, an island kingdom in the North Sea.

Genie Lo thought she was busy last year, juggling her academic career with protecting the Bay Area from demons. But now, as the Heaven-appointed Guardian of California, she’s responsible for the well-being of all yaoguai and spirits on Earth. Even the ones who interrupt her long-weekend visit to a prestigious college, bearing terrible news about a cosmos-threatening force of destruction in a nearby alternate dimension.

Comedy and fantasy collide in this Dungeons & Dragons genre parody. This audiobook is a spin-off of the infamous Journal of an Outlaw series by Mick McArt. Although set in the same world as the Outlaw, Nimbus "Stormcloud" Slumberdim has an entirely different approach to adventuring in the Unremembered Realms. Being a good guy isn't as easy as it seems, thanks to his traveling party of Garrot the Mage, Kellepto the elven thief, Aiden the cleric, and the feisty dwarven monk named Footpalm the Elflinger.

An evil wizard has a midlife crisis. Is trying to sacrifice your estranged wife to a bloodthirsty demon an irredeemable act of evil? This is the sort of question the Dread Wizard Darruk Darkbringer struggles with. After being called evil one too many times, Darruk sets off to find a new purpose in his life and become a beloved celebrity. Can a dark wizard come to terms with himself and prove to the world that a few atrocities don’t define who he is? You’ll feel guilty for laughing at his twisted tale of self-discovery.

Everyone believes he’s the chosen one. They’ve made a horrible mistake. When a madman claiming to be a wizard mistakenly identifies the cynical farmhand Nathelion as a hero foretold in prophecy, he eagerly plays along for a free and adventurous journey. But he would have stayed home if he’d known the flattering title came with such deadly baggage. Joined by a ragtag band of followers with more lofty ideals than common sense, Nathelion marches toward a noble destiny he borrowed for personal gain.