Epic Fantasy Humor

Witness the epic battle of the cyclops! Visit the endangered dragon preserve! Please, no slaying. Solve the mystery of The Mystery Cottage, if you dare! Buy some knickknacks from The Fates! They might come in handy later. On a road trip across an enchanted America, Helen and Troy will discover all this and more. If the curse placed upon them by an ancient god doesn't kill them or the pack of reluctant orc assassins don't catch up to them, Helen and Troy might reach the end their journey in one piece, where they might just end up destroying the world.

Murland Kadabra has always dreamed of becoming a great wizard. However, at age 19, the young apprentice has yet to successfully cast a single spell. He has been reduced to grounds keeper of Abra Tower, and has become the laughing stock of the wizarding school. But when the Most High Wizard Kazimir chooses him to be one of the five Champions of the Dragon, Murland's life changes forever.

Jaron and Bren are a pair of roguish adventurers only hoping for one big score. Unfortunately, things never work out that easy. Whether facing packs of hungry goblins, armies of marauding orcs, malevolent cults, or even the mythical Galackin, the odds always seem to be stacked against this intrepid duo. This is a collection of 10 fantasy flash fiction stories, each with a comedic bent. Fans of the Discworld will enjoy the situational humor, while lovers of traditional fantasy will enjoy seeing common fantasy tropes in a different light.

Things not to do when you find out you’re a wizard: 1. Do not destroy your apartment with magical fire. You WILL NOT get the security deposit back. 2. Do not form an alliance with the guy who is trying to murder you. This will end badly. 3. Do not drag the girl you’re desperately in love with into your wizard mess. You risk her watching you fail miserably. 4. Under no circumstances should you get in the middle of an epic magical battle. Death will happen. Lots of death and bad things.

Leon is settling into his new virtual life, just him and his harem of skimpily clad maidens. With Brightla’s new Adventurer’s Guild near completion, things are looking on the up and up. Now if only he could live in peace, but that doesn’t seem like an option in the virtual world. Too bad no one else has any OP cheat abilities like him, so it should be fine, right? In any case, Leon won’t let anyone threaten his maidens, especially when more than one of them are eating for two...

Pix just wants to hunt monsters, craft armor, and pay off her college loans. Her partner Jaz does too. She just wants to pet the monsters more. While wearing impractical hot pants armor. And wielding a sword so massive she needs magic gems to carry it.

All Lex wanted was to help his good buddy Gryph find his sister and maybe save the world along the way. But everything goes wrong from the start when Lex gets separated from Gryph during their transfer into the Realms. Lost, alone, and forced to live the same day over and over, Lex must defeat the agent of a despotic god, uncover hidden truths about himself, and find his way back to his friend. If he fails the Realms face destruction.

The Chosen One must be retrieved from Earth. He will bring down the wall and restore the kingdom to glory. His name is Tom Parking. With this mysterious yet oddly ordinary-looking prophecy, Tom’s fate is sealed: he’s been plucked from his life and whisked away to a magical kingdom to be its Chosen One.

Set a thousand years (give or take) before the events of Disenchanted, Distopia tells the story of Wyngalf the Bold, the legendary hero renowned for ridding the land of Dis of the scourge of dragons. The story begins as Wyngalf, a young missionary for an obscure religious sect, arrives in the port city of Skuldred. Desperate to prove his worth to his superiors, Wyngalf finds himself drafted into leading a missionary voyage across the sea to the semilegendary land of Dis.

In the spirit of Flashman, and in the inimitable George MacDonald Fraser style, comes a rousing story of prize fighting in the 19th century. Reissued in a stunning new package, Black Ajax will attract a new generation of fans. When Captain Buck Flashman sees the black boxer catch a fly in midflight, he realizes that he is in the presence of speed such as the prize ring has never seen.

Yancy Lazarus is having a bad day: there's a bullet lodged in his butt cheek, his face looks like the site of a demolition derby, and he's been saran-wrapped to a banquet table. He never should have answered the phone. Stupid bleeding heart - helping others in his circles is a good way to die - just ask the gang members ripped to pieces by some kind of demonic nightmare in LA.

Gerald Dunwoody is a wizard. Just not a particularly good one. He's blown up a factory, lost his job, and there's a chance that he's not really a Third Grade wizard after all. So it's off to New Ottosland to be the new Court Wizard for King Lional. It's a shame that King Lional isn't the vain, self-centered young man he appeared to be. With a princess in danger, a talking bird who can't stay out of trouble, and a kingdom to save, Gerald soon suspects that he might be out of his depth.

Apropos is a rogue, a rascal, a scoundrel, a cheat...and those are his good points. Lame of leg but fast of wit, the only reason Apropos doesn't consider chivalry dead is because he's not yet through with it. An orphan with a chip on his shoulder, Apropos, travels to the court of the good King Runcible, with three goals in mind: to find his father, seek retribution for the death of his mother, and to line his own pockets. However, Apropos carries the most troublesome burden a would-be harbinger of chaos can bear: He may well be a hero foretold, a young man of destiny.

Star-crossed lovers? The mage and her knight? The Fool and the Genius, the world’s oddest couple? Claire and Anthony have a storied and colorful past. Ahem. It took Anthony nearly 1,000 times to ask Claire out on a date, you know? Like, come on. They were adventuring together for years! Maybe he wasn’t the fool. Claire, didn’t notice you there - don’t give me that look! You’re starting to scare me...Uh, okay, so, this world’s greatest love story continues, even though Dena is not a safe place....

An evil wizard has a midlife crisis. Is trying to sacrifice your estranged wife to a bloodthirsty demon an irredeemable act of evil? This is the sort of question the Dread Wizard Darruk Darkbringer struggles with. After being called evil one too many times, Darruk sets off to find a new purpose in his life and become a beloved celebrity. Can a dark wizard come to terms with himself and prove to the world that a few atrocities don’t define who he is? You’ll feel guilty for laughing at his twisted tale of self-discovery.

Sharing a beer with Death - one of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse - really put a few things into perspective for this foul-mouthed, billionaire wizard. Like finally getting the stones to propose to his girlfriend. But the Brothers Grimm - legendary supernatural assassins - have escaped their prison, and the number one thing they want after their centuries-long incarceration is Nate Temple’s head. With the entire wedding party also on their hit list and the Temple family fortune in jeopardy, Nate realizes they can’t run and they can’t hide. So, time to do magic and stuff.

The ancient pact between mankind, heaven, and hell has been broken, and Nate Temple’s quest for vengeance may have just kicked off Armageddon. So, time to grab a stiff drink…or maybe four. Already plagued with night terrors that could qualify him as a card-carrying insomniac, Nate can barely even manage to put on his pants in the morning, let alone pick teams for the Apocalypse. But when he’s framed as a demon sympathizer, condemned by the Armies of Heaven, and hunted down by both his allies and the Four Horsemen, this wizard doesn’t think it can get any worse.

Nate is losing that last finger hold on his sanity: hallucinating and talking to creatures no one else can see. The demon inside of him is fighting for dominance, and only one of them can survive. But when Nate's extorted to rescue a chimera child from the Beast Master’s circus, his only option is to partner with his inner demon, risking his very soul. With allies turned enemies, the fae breathing down his neck, and a dangerous child’s life on the line, Nate must call upon new storybook legends to save his traitorous friends from becoming the Beast Master’s next victims.

Un nuevo día, sereno y apacible, empieza en el Mundodisco. Como es habitual, la gran tortuga navega por el éter entregada a reflexiones inescrutables, sosteniendo en su caparazón a los cuatro elefantes sobre los que descansa el mundo. Sin embargo, se avecina una inexorable colisión con una malévola estrella roja, y solo una persona puede poner remedio al inminente desastre: Rincewind, el inepto y cobarde hechicero. Por desgracia, Rincewind fue visto por última vez cuando caía por el borde del mundo...

Veranix Calbert leads a double life. By day, he’s a struggling magic student at the University of Maradaine. At night, he spoils the drug trade of Willem Fenmere, crime boss of Dentonhill and murderer of Veranix’s father. He’s determined to shut Fenmere down. With that goal in mind, Veranix disrupts the delivery of two magical artifacts meant for Fenmere's clients, the mages of the Blue Hand Circle. Using these power-filled objects in his fight, he quickly becomes a real thorn in Fenmere's side.