Fantasy Patrick

An overweight draftsman with a love for science fiction answers an ad in the back of his favorite magazine. It promises an incredible weight-loss miracle, but the return address is from Brimstone, Texas. In this wacky tale of diet and revenge, getting what you wish for might cost your immortal soul.

In which your StoryPod author and narrator, James Patrick Kelly, has an unexpected encounter with an old friend and sees his mundane life pushed off the edge of reality. REMINDER: this is a work of fiction.

It's Christmas and one of the aliens wants to go shopping at the mall to get in the proper holiday spirit. The trouble is, he doesn't know an elf from an elephant. Here's a wacky Yule story about intelligence, diversity, and too many tins of fruitcake.

A psychological study masquerading as an experiment in time travel lures an undergraduate English major to volunteer. To the astonishment of the psychologists in charge of the study, he takes their instructions to heart - with horrific results.

In this wild and funny tale, a sentient television show is struggling to survive the death of her main character. Her ratings are plummeting, her live audience is comatose, her new star has stage fright, and her guest star is gleefully upstaging her entire cast. What's a show to do? Maybe cut a deal with the devil?

Mike has it all: a loving wife, a bright son, a steady job, and a house on a lake. Then why does he feel as though he had locked himself in and thrown away the key? And what is the meaning of the disturbing dream that haunts him night after night, the one in which he is revealed to be a coward? In a horrifying moment that shatters his tranquil life, his courage will be put to the ultimate test.

Here's an emotional tale of family secrets set in 2038. Jen has been estranged from her father, a Shakespearian actor, ever since he got divorced from her mother years and years ago. But when her mother dies, Jen is astonished to discover that she has left her ex-husband a fortune in her will. Jen tries to confront her father, but first she must get past the robot that cares for him. This is a Hugo, Nebula, and Sturgeon nominee, and the winner of the Locus Award for best short story of 1997.

The last man on Earth is depressed and the robots charged with his care are at a loss as to how to shake him out of it. They concoct an elaborate scheme to have Christmas in May. After all, at the end of history, who cares if the dates are a little off? This story was a Hugo Award finalist in 2004.

When the bombs fell, there were precious few survivors. Young Lucy and Juan were spared, but they fell into the clutches of the Bad Daddy. After their escape, they scavenge through the ruins in New England, barely able to make sense of the civilization that destroyed itself, until they meet Hannah, who has a vision and, perhaps, the technology to make it come true.

Jack is having an affair with Suzanne. He invites her to lunch to tell her that he's leaving his wife so that they can be together. But just before Suzanne arrives, a stranger approaches Jack and asks for help - a stranger whom no one can see but Jack.

Children fighting on the front lines? Maybe in some other country. But things have gone from bad to worse in the U.S. as the South American war drags on. Now the government has hatched a scheme to attract teens and even preteens into the army: they are offering kids a chance to be the star of The Johnny America Show, a reality show set on the battlefront. In a country wracked by shortages and draft sweeps and despair, maybe picking up a gun isn't such a bad idea after all.

Whatever Nojo imagines comes true, which is why he's huddled with a group of other homeless men under a bridge on a frigid winter night. They're waiting for Mags and her mysterious friend Angel, who may be bringing them the whiskey they crave or the death they fear.

A career woman, wracked by guilt over the death of her young daughter, begins to find toys scattered around her house. Is she being haunted or going mad? Her psychiatrist insists that it's all in her mind but the truth is far stranger - and emotionally wrenching.

As humankind's first starship accelerates past the speed of light, an astronaut wakes up and finds that he is all alone. The crew is gone, the sensors give no readings, and he is trapped. Alone? Not quite. His imaginary wife keeps him company and helps him keep a tenuous hold on his sanity.

An alien has crash landed in a sleepy country town, and its ship stands guard over the fallen spaceman. When some unlikely townsfolk happen upon the site of the tragedy, what began as a game turns into a deadly first contact - with consequences for all humankind.

Les hates the artificial baby that Birth Control has given her, but she tries to take care of it because she wants to have a real baby of her own. But now the baby is sick and needs a doctor, and Les is broke and on the run. She has a gun but no ammunition. Yet.

'The Wide, Wide Sea' is a Chaos Walking short story. Set before the Spackle War in a small fishing village by the sea, this is a heartbreaking tale of love and loyalty in a divided world. Best listened to immediately after The Ask and the Answer, it features familiar characters such as Mistress Coyle but gives a new perspective on the shocking events in the award-winning trilogy.

Sometimes discretion is the better part of valor. Sometimes it's just best to get the hell out of Dodge. After turning an ancient vampire to dust and stirring the Coven into a mob of pitchfork-and-torch-bearing vampires, Chris Gordon thinks it might be time for a road trip. So, leaving Tanya to calm the troubled masses, he heads south to help a North Carolina pack with some demon troubles.

One witch is the most feared, the most ruthless, and the most deadly of all the witches in the county. If she hunts for you, she will find you. If you have crossed her, you don't stand a chance. She is the witch assassin, and her name is Grimalkin. Grimalkin's one alliance is with Tom Ward, the Spook's apprentice. With Tom, she plans to rid the world of the most terrifying evil, the Fiend, who once did her a great wrong. For the first time, fans of the Last Apprentice series will hear the story from Grimalkin's side.

This audiobook is the official prequel, introducing key concepts that then will explode onto the screen in the movie The Predator. The official prequel novel leads into the summer blockbuster The Predator, Shane Black's new movie set within the universe of the previous films. With a screenplay by Shane Black and Fred Dekker, the film stars Yvonne Strahovski, Boyd Holbrook, Olivia Munn, Alfie Allen, Thomas Jane, Sterling Brown, Keegan-Michael Key, Edward James Olmos, Jake Busey, and more.