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  • Come As You Are: Revised and Updated

  • The Surprising New Science That Will Transform Your Sex Life
  • Written by: Emily Nagoski PhD
  • Narrated by: Emily Nagoski, Nicholas Boulton
  • Length: 11 hrs and 30 mins
  • 4.8 out of 5 stars (356 ratings)

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Come As You Are: Revised and Updated

Written by: Emily Nagoski PhD
Narrated by: Emily Nagoski, Nicholas Boulton
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Publisher's Summary

A revised and updated edition of Emily Nagoski’s game-changing New York Times best seller Come As You Are, featuring new information and research on mindfulness, desire, and pleasure that will radically transform your sex life.

For much of the 20th and 21st centuries, women’s sexuality was an uncharted territory in science, studied far less frequently - and far less seriously - than its male counterpart.

That is, until Emily Nagoski’s Come As You Are, which used groundbreaking science and research to prove that the most important factor in creating and sustaining a sex life filled with confidence and joy is not what the parts are or how they’re organized but how you feel about them. In the years since the book’s initial publication, countless women have learned through Nagoski’s accessible and informative guide that things like stress, mood, trust, and body image are not peripheral factors in a woman’s sexual well-being; they are central to it - and that even if you don’t always feel like it, you are already sexually whole by just being yourself. This revised and updated edition continues that mission with new information and advanced research, demystifying and decoding the science of sex so that everyone can create a better sex life and discover more pleasure than you ever thought possible.

PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.

©2015, 2021 Emily Nagoski, Ph.D. All rights reserved. (P)2021 Simon & Schuster, Inc. All rights reserved.
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What listeners say about Come As You Are: Revised and Updated

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    5 out of 5 stars

Great Book (Man’s Perspective). Helps to understand the other side

Great info for my marriage, and for raising my daughters. I admit I’m a bit sensitive to words like patriarchy as I am a male, but I can’t argue the way the words are used in this book. Given the target audience (clearly female, as there are parts the refer to the reader’s vagina), I imagine these are the words and context women need to understand the biases given to them by a culture that gently trains women to be objects of attraction for men.
Didn’t excessively feminist or attacking, well written, surprisingly well read (I find authors generally make better authors than readers - she is actually quite good).

I hope many more read this book, as it would help balance a little more in the direction I want for my daughters - more focused on healthy appreciation for ones whole self.

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8 people found this helpful

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Empowering, informative

Emily does a fantastic job walking you through many myths and cultural programming around women’s bodies and sexuality. Not only science and research based yet delivered with compassion and relatable experiences to further reveal your own truth and understanding. A shareable knowledge for everyone. Thank-you for your work on furthering sex education.

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Thought I was broken

For years before reading this book o thought I was broken. The information given here can be life changing if you’ve never heard it before. Thank you Emily for writing this.

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    5 out of 5 stars
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Every Individual should read this

This book is transformational. Contains information about everything I wish I knew earlier and the affirmations I didn’t know I needed to hear.

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    5 out of 5 stars
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Game changer

This is the book I’ve been waiting for. A book that didn’t tell me “how to get better” or “how to overcome your trauma” - even though that’s what I was originally looking for, because society was telling me I was broken. This was a book telling me that I am normal and that my sexuality is normal, regardless of what I’ve been told my entire life as a cis-gender, heterosexual female. Thank you, Emily.

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1 person found this helpful

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A couples digest.

I wanted to give this 5 starts all around, but I thought it was lacking when it came to the self. Most chapters focused on relationships and all subjected detailed in the book are in relationships. I assumed that the author would dive more into self-love and overcoming on our own. Not everyone is in a monogamous relationship with another, and this book almost made me feel like we need a partner to help fix us. Aside from my own opinion above, I still learned a lot and enjoyed the authors style as well as the thorough, but easy to read science. I still suggest this book to friends, just not necessarily my single friends.

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Total game changer

I was recommended this book when I was in the "pit of despair", as Emily Nagoski says, and it helped me immensely understanding and accepting my sexuality. Every women should read this book.

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Excellent information and narration

Love how Emily talks directly to the listener and connects with every question and concern that a woman has about her body and how sex has or hasn’t happened for her. She delivers science in approachable and understandable bites that make the discussion format more than just talking with a best friend - you’re hearing from a trusted therapist, who is able to reassure you that you’re “normal” and to trust your body and experiences.
Didn’t learn most of this in nursing school, and definitely didn’t learn this from society.
A must read for all women from 18-98.

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Most positive and validating sexual book

It's not just pleasure, it's context, connection and wholeness. A place everyone belongs. A place to be YOUR normal.

Extremely validating information and instruction from, "All the same parts just arranged differently." to helping you discover, "Why do I like sex?"

I enjoyed how she talked about our brakes and accelerators. It helped give me a way to communicate with my partner and a way to push back what the systems of the world told me I should think about sex.

I wish my younger self read this instead of all the no sex before marriage/purity culture books I read growing up. My teens will definitely be reading this book!

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3 people found this helpful

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a must read/listen!

this book should be mandatory reading/listening for every human. even if you don't feel broken in the bedroom and aren't looking to solve any problems in your personal life, you will find something to take away from this book.

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