The Four Tendencies
The Indispensable Personality Profiles That Reveal How to Make Your Life Better (and Other People's Lives Better, Too)
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Narrated by:
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Gretchen Rubin
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Written by:
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Gretchen Rubin
About this listen
In this groundbreaking analysis of personality type, best-selling author of Better Than Before and The Happiness Project Gretchen Rubin reveals the one simple question that will transform what you do at home, at work, and in life.
During her multi-book investigation into understanding human nature, Gretchen Rubin realized that by asking the seemingly dry question “How do I respond to expectations?” we gain explosive self-knowledge. She discovered that based on their answer, people fit into Four Tendencies: Upholders, Questioners, Obligers, and Rebels. Our Tendency shapes every aspect of our behavior, so using this framework allows us to make better decisions, meet deadlines, suffer less stress, and engage more effectively.
More than 600,000 people have taken her online quiz, and managers, doctors, teachers, spouses, and parents already use the framework to help people make significant, lasting change.
The Four Tendencies hold practical answers if you’ve ever thought:
- People can rely on me, but I can’t rely on myself.
- How can I help someone to follow good advice?
- People say I ask too many questions.
- How do I work with someone who refuses to do what I ask - or who keeps telling me what to do?
With sharp insight, compelling research, and hilarious examples, The Four Tendencies will help you get happier, healthier, more productive, and more creative. It’s far easier to succeed when you know what works for you.
©2017 Gretchen Rubin (P)2017 Random House AudioWhat listeners say about The Four Tendencies
Average Customer RatingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Amazon Customer
- 2019-04-26
Very useful!
As an upholder with a husband who is an obliger really helped me understand him better. Love Gretchen and all the content she produces
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- Sarah Langley
- 2019-03-16
Eye opening!
I heard about this book on a podcast I was listening to. I did a bit more research and knew I had to listen to it. Ive learned so much about myself, the patterns of my past and the dynamic of my marriage. I’m gonna share this book with all my friends!
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- Tabitha power
- 2019-07-01
What a game changer this book has been for me!
I absolutely loved this book and all of Gretchen's work. I am a polyamorous questioner and I am partnered with two rebels, it's so fascinating to finally feel like I have the key to unlock so much of what has felt like hitting my head against the wall with not being able to understand their decision processes. I feel like I understand myself and them better now.
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- Mark Wiebe
- 2019-09-21
life changing
life changer. as a rebel I've always struggled to move forward especially in my business. now I know why and how to work around my tendency!
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1 person found this helpful
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- Dawn Saprunoff
- 2018-09-11
A Must read!
This book has helped me beyond words that I can express.
I'm an obligor and I have finally figured out why I do the things I do and what keeps me going thanks to this book.
I've recently bought copies for most of my girlfriends and insisted that everybody read it.
I'm beyond grateful for this knowledge that I have it's improved my marriage and my relationship with myself.
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- E. Coates
- 2018-09-18
Eye opening!
A great "manual" for working and living with different personality types, and understanding why you do certain things. The narrator is engaging and the story is well laid out, giving examples of each personality type and how to interact with those different from your personality type. Raising an Obliger and a Questioner means I have to phrase things differently depending on who I am talking to. So very helpful! #Audible1
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- Diana S.
- 2023-01-17
Useful book
Though I questioned the tendencies at first and took awhile to wrap my head around the ideas in the book, once I did I found it very useful. I will likely reread this book and take some notes on it if some key points.
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- Ken M
- 2019-09-01
Awesome tool
Enjoyed this book. Excellent clarity in understanding the four tendencies and how to work with those different from oneself. Thank you
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- Anonymous User
- 2023-07-03
A MUST-READ for anyone who wants to lead or influence others
Also very useful in understanding our own tendencies and patterns and those around us, how to reduce the friction and resistance, and become more effective in leading ourselves and others.
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- Kris Rostecki
- 2021-05-28
Easy to digest and assimilate
I wish I had had this information earlier in life!! ( says the questioner with endless need for more info) 😆
Very simple. Very helpful. Looking forward to putting into use in my day to day communications! Thank you!
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1 person found this helpful