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The Science of Trust

Emotional Attunement for Couples

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The Science of Trust

Written by: John M. Gottman Ph.D.
Narrated by: J. Charles
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About this listen

For the past 35 years, John Gottman’s research has been internationally recognized for its unprecedented ability to precisely measure interactive processes in couples and to predict the long-term success or failure of relationships. In this groundbreaking book, he presents a new approach to understanding and changing couples: a fundamental social skill called “emotional attunement,” which describes a couple’s ability to fully process and move on from negative emotional events, ultimately creating a stronger relationship.

Gottman draws from this longitudinal research and theory to show how emotional attunement can downregulate negative affect, help couples focus on positive traits and memories, and even help prevent domestic violence. He offers a detailed intervention devised to cultivate attunement, thereby helping couples connect, respect each other, and show affection. Emotional attunement is extended to tackle the subjects of flooding, the story we tell ourselves about our relationship, conflict, personality, changing relationships, and gender. Gottman also explains how to create emotional attunement when it is missing, to lay a foundation that will carry the relationship through difficult times.

Gottman encourages couples to cultivate attunement through awareness, tolerance, understanding, non-defensive listening, and empathy. These qualities, he argues, inspire confidence in couples, and the sense that despite the inevitable struggles, the relationship is enduring and resilient.

This book, an essential follow-up to his 1999 The Marriage Clinic, offers therapists, students, and researchers a detailed intervention for working with couples, and offers couples a roadmap to a stronger future together.

©2012 John M. Gottman (P)2012 Brilliance Audio, Inc.
Psychology Relationships Feel Better Mental Health Young Adult
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What listeners say about The Science of Trust

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    3 out of 5 stars

All about the science

very technical if your interested in the science it's great but you are not going get actionable steps like some of his other books available

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Lots of good info!

an excellent informative listen.
well written, well performed, well worth it.
will be listening to more Dr Gottman work for sure

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great information

Very technical with lots of research findings and statistical analysis. There is some great information about how couples can establish, re-establish and heal through unfortunate events and even catastrophes.

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Good if you are a counselor ... I think

I picked up the book thinking I can learn something about trust (especially in couples). Well, I barely managed to struggle my way through the book. And in the end, I think I may have learn a thing or two... But must say most of it is probably more suited to those who is working in the field of couple counselling. Maybe the other 41 people who collectively gave this a 4.5 star rating all live and breath this topic. But for layman like me... it just does not resonate.

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Way over my head

This audiobook requires your full concentration. I had a very hard time understanding what the author was trying to say. Even example dialogues were hard to understand. I appreciated certain pieces of information based on the findings at the Love Lab. But that was about it. This book is not for everyone.

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7 people found this helpful