Showing results by author "Steve Pavlina" in All Categories

We are what we make ourselves to be. From one perspective we’re all separate individuals. From another perspective we can see ourselves as a unified whole. Imagine a gigantic sheet of aluminum foil with billions of tiny indentations in it, like protruding fingers. As individuals we’re the dents. Collectively we’re the foil. You can choose to adopt either perspective, or switch back and forth. As an individual your power is limited. You’re just a dent in a sea of other dents. But you have an interesting perspective on the whole sheet. No other dent sees the same picture you do.

The nice thing about working on your personal growth is that when you make a concerted, dedicated effort to improve some part of your life, there's an excellent chance that you will succeed in the long run. You may have a lot of gunk to clear out in terms of limiting beliefs, and you may be starting from a disadvantaged position, but given enough time, it’s entirely possible.

When you desire to attract and meet a new relationship partner, a common approach is to be more social, start connecting with new people, and try to be as likeable as possible. I think that’s a mistake.

One of the conscious growth principles I’ve been teaching for years is the principle of Love. This principle states that you’ll grow significantly faster - and enjoy the process of growth much more - when your life is rich in supportive, encouraging connections. People violate this principle constantly - and to their detriment when they do so. Partly that happens because they don’t understand this principle deeply enough. Consider two scenarios.

Suppose a group of superintelligent aliens came to earth. Or suppose that humans developed some advanced A.I. that’s far beyond our mental and physical abilities. If we could somehow communicate with these beings, what might we say to them? We might be too scared to say anything. We might just run and hide. But if we could manage our fear enough to say something, we can imagine some possible scenarios.

There's a notion that's been spread around the spiritual side of the self-help field that suggests one of our primary aims in life should be ego-less enlightenment, a state where we achieve near-perfect inner peace, where we're one with everything but attached to nothing, and where nothing in the physical world can knock us off balance.

Someone asked about the best way to handle competition. How do you ensure that your efforts will pay off instead of merely jumping into a giant pool with everyone else and being unable to stand out? My strategy for dealing with competition is the same no matter what field I work in. I’m sure you can apply it to your particular field as well, although there’s a good chance you won’t want to, since it isn’t easy.

While I normally write for people who are interested in improving their lives, I’m aware that many are committed to the opposite path. These people deliberately decline steps that would lead to measurable improvements. They prefer that everything goes wrong - for as long as possible. Sometimes they screw up and accidentally do something right. They’re usually able to sabotage these unwanted successes in short order, but they like it best when they can prevent these positive experiences from ever happening in the first place.

Personal branding is basically the way you market yourself to the world. Your personal brand is what other people think of you. In some ways it’s outside your control, but you obviously have some influence over it. Personal branding is unavoidable. As others interact with you, they’ll automatically form mental associations that connect you with certain labels, often within the first few seconds. You can’t avoid being labeled.

I had already dropped TV news and newspapers, but I still had the habit of checking Yahoo News or CNN every day or two, so for 30 days I decided to drop all news sources and go totally news-free. In this audiobook I'll share what I learned from this experiment. It went well enough that I intend to remain free of the habit of daily news checking.

"There is no fatigue so wearisome as that which comes from lack of work." - Charles Spurgeon. If you've been stuck in a lazy rut lately, here are some suggestions to get yourself working productively...

The most important aspect of manifesting money is to approach it from the right heartset. Think of your heartset as the overall vibe of your relationship to the activity of attracting money. How would you describe that relationship? Is it greedy, needy, excited, hopeful, etc? If you approach this process from a place of neediness, clinginess, scarcity, or too much seriousness, you’ll most likely fail.

Have you ever had the experience of looking back on your week with the sinking feeling that you didn't get as much done as you'd hoped? When building a successful career or a business of your own, your time is perhaps your most valuable asset, and your income is a direct result of how you spend your time. You cannot buy any more time than you're given, and the clock is always ticking.

When you make a decision that goes against the grain of the prevailing social pressure in your life, such as by quitting your job to start your own business, there's a tendency to think of yourself as being rebellious, independent, willful, or just plain different. Other people may label you thusly, so you might start applying such labels to yourself as well. Be careful with this type of thinking though. It could have unwanted side effects if you go too far with it.

One of the most important considerations when helping someone in a negative state is that you must avoid falling into negativity yourself. It makes no difference what particular circumstances negative people blame for their negative outlook. Ultimately it's still a choice rooted in free will. No matter how unconscious the person was when making the decision to sink into negativity, in this moment that person still has the power to choose otherwise. So if you decide to help such a person, your primary role is to help guide him to make a more conscious choice, one that will likely be much more empowering.

There are actually quite a number of ways to decondition a negative thought pattern. The basic idea is to replace the old pattern with a new one. Mentally resisting the negative thought will usually backfire - you'll simply reinforce it and make it even worse. The more you fire those neurons in the same way, the stronger the pattern becomes. Here's a little method I use to break negative thought patterns.

After a tragedy or loss, your initial reaction is unconscious and instinctive. There isn't much you can do about that except to ride it out. But the passage of time will soon reduce the intensity of those emotions, and that's when you regain enough consciousness to choose your ongoing reaction. Now you have a choice.

What does it mean to be a man today? How can men consciously express their masculinity without becoming cold or closed-hearted on the one hand... or wimpy and emasculated on the other?

If a lack of clarity prevents you from taking action, then find or develop a process to gain sufficient clarity to act. Stop acting like this is an unsolvable problem. It isn't.

In this book you will learn all about how to make sense of infinite possibilities, love the chaos, find order and clarity despite chaos, stay or go decisions, what to do when objective reality beats you down, shedding personal weaknesses, EQing your life, turning weaknesses into strengths, how to address core weaknesses, how to work from your strengths and train up your weaknesses, how to move a skill to a different part of your brain to improve productivity, how re-framing fear could improve productivity, learning new skills, and the skill of calibration.