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Addiction doesn’t just impact the person struggling—it shakes the foundation of relationships, testing love, trust, and resilience. In this powerful episode, we hear from a couple who faced the devastating effects of substance use disorder in their marriage. They share the raw truth about how addiction nearly tore them apart, the breaking point that forced change, and the hard work it took to rebuild trust and connection. Through honesty, recovery, and personal growth, they found a way forward. Tune in for a story of pain, healing, and the strength of love in the face of addiction.

Meeting that is on Sunday mornings mentioned by Rick:

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Do you find yourself constantly putting others’ needs ahead of your own, even at the expense of your well-being? People-pleasing can be exhausting, especially when dealing with a loved one who struggles with addiction. In this episode, we explore the roots of people-pleasing, how it keeps us trapped in unhealthy cycles, and practical steps to set boundaries and prioritize self-care. Learn how to shift from seeking approval to living authentically—without guilt.

Journal prompts compliments of Marijanel

https://marijanel.com/blog/f/break-away-from-people-pleasing-free-journal-prompts

1. Do I often say yes to requests or invitations, even when I don't really want to do them? And why or why not? Really asking yourself that why or why not? Question is where we dig those layers deeper into what mechanisms are inside of us that are causing us to do these things and to seek this constant approval?
2. Do I avoid conflict or difficult conversations? Because I'm afraid of upsetting others or being rejected? Why? Or why not?
3. How often do I prioritize other people's needs over my own work? And how does this impact my own well being and happiness? Are you happy doing this? So you essentially ask yourself, Am I happy doing this?
4. Do I find myself constantly seeking approval and validation from others? And how does this impact my self esteem and self self worth? Am I happy doing this really events? Right now we're really evaluating and taking in inventory? What's going on inside of our hearts?
5. How do I respond when someone asks for feedback? Or criticism? Do I avoid being honest or direct?
6. Do I find myself over committing or feeling overwhelmed? Because I've said yes to too many things? And how do I need to set boundaries? And what boundaries could I set?
7. What steps can I take to balance my desire to please other people with my own needs and well being? So essentially, how can I communicate my boundaries and assert myself in a healthy way?

Dr. Neha Sangwan books: Powered by Me. Talk R

Dr. Carly LeBaron LFMT. https://www.embracingauthenticity.org/about-me

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Resentment can be a heavy burden, keeping us stuck in pain, blame, and frustration. In this episode, we dive into the power of a resentment inventory—what it is, why it matters, and how it can help you break free from old wounds. Whether you're navigating relationships with loved ones struggling with addiction or just looking to let go of lingering anger, this step-by-step approach can bring clarity, healing, and peace. Tune in to learn how taking an honest look at your resentments can create space for growth, forgiveness, and personal freedom.

**Resentment Inventory Worksheet**

**Step 1: Identify Your Resentments**

List the people, institutions, or situations you resent and why.

**Who or What I Resent** | **Why I Feel Resentful** | **How It Affects Me**

Example: My spouse | They continue to drink despite my efforts to help. | Self-esteem, emotional security, fear of the future. |

**Reflection Questions:**

- When did this resentment begin?

- How has it grown over time?

- How does holding onto this resentment make me feel?

**Step 2: How This Resentment Impacts Me**

For each resentment, consider the ways it affects different areas of your life.

| **Area of My Life** | **How This Resentment Affects It**

| My self-esteem | (e.g., "I feel unworthy or not good enough.") |

| My relationships | (e.g., "I shut down emotionally or become controlling.") |

| My peace of mind | (e.g., "I replay conversations in my head and feel anxious.") |

| My physical health | (e.g., "I feel tense, have headaches, or trouble sleeping.") |

**Reflection Questions:**

- What emotions come up when I think about this resentment? (Anger, sadness, frustration, fear, etc.)

- Is this resentment affecting people in my life who weren’t involved? (e.g., Am I lashing out at others?)

## **Step 3: My Role in the Resentment**

This is about self-awareness, not self-blame. Identify any ways in which you contributed to the situation or how you continue to hold onto the resentment.

| **What Was My Part in This?** | **Unrealistic Expectations?** | **Attempts to Control?** |

| Example: I kept trying to make them change instead of focusing on my boundaries. | Yes, I expected them to stop drinking just because I wanted them to. | Yes, I tried to manipulate or guilt them into stopping. |**Step 4: Letting Go of Resentment**

This step is about releasing the emotional burden and shifting your focus to healing.

| **What I Can Accept** | **How I Can Practice Forgiveness** | **Steps to Let Go**

| Example: I accept that I cannot change others, only myself. | I can pray for them (even if I don’t feel like it) or write a letter I won’t send. | I will focus on my own growth and healing instead of their choices.

**Reflection Questions:**

- What would my life look like if I let go of this resentment?

- Can I see this person as sick, struggling, or acting from their own pain?

- What healthy action can I take instead of holding onto resentment?

## **Final Reflection:**

- How do I feel after working through this resentment inventory?

- What is one small action I can take today to move forward?

- How can I be kind to myself as I continue healing?

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Do you feel like you have to handle everything yourself? Are you the one everyone relies on, even when you're drowning in stress? In this episode, we dive into high-functioning codependency—what it looks like, how it impacts your health and relationships, and why it’s so hard to recognize. We'll explore the hidden toll of constantly meeting others' needs at your own expense, the long-term effects on stress and well-being, and, most importantly, how to break free. If you've ever wondered whether your strength is actually keeping you stuck, this episode is for you.

Journal prompts from Lestallion blog:

1. Reflect on a time when you felt overly responsible for someone else's emotions. How did it make you feel, and what did you learn from that experience?Describe a situation where you neglected your own needs to please someone else. What were the consequences, and how did it affect your sense of self-worth?
2. Think about a relationship in your life that feels unbalanced. What are the dynamics at play, and how does it impact your emotional well-being?
3. Write about a time when you felt anxious about someone else's approval. What were you afraid of, and how did it influence your actions?
4. Consider your boundaries. Are there any relationships where your boundaries are often crossed? How can you reinforce them more effectively?

Prior episode on codependency: Episode 7 "Lets talk codependency"

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When a loved one struggles with addiction, the question of intervention often arises—but how do you know what approach is best? In this episode, we sit down with Chuck Montante, a Certified Substance Abuse Counselor and Licensed Mental Health Counselor, to explore the differences between open and closed interventions. We discuss what makes each approach effective, common pitfalls to avoid, and how families can prepare for these difficult but necessary conversations. Whether you're considering an intervention or simply want to understand the process better, this episode offers expert insight and practical advice.

Chuck Montante: 585 473-1500 Westfall Associates Rochester NY

Books Mentioned:

Dreamland: The True Tale of America's Opiate Epidemic by Sam Quinones

In The Realm of Hungry Ghosts by Gabor Mate

Intervention Messages Worksheet:

1. Your observation of their beghavior.

2. Your feelings about what you have seen.

3. How things could be different. (The message of hope.)

4. Your "bottom line". What you intend to do if they do not address the problem.

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In this episode, we explore the powerful tool of tapping, also known as Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT), to help you find calm amidst the challenges of loving someone with addiction. Whether you’re feeling overwhelmed, anxious, or stuck in a cycle of worry, tapping can provide a simple and effective way to release stress and bring yourself back to center. We’ll walk through how tapping works, why it’s especially helpful for those navigating the complexities of addiction in their relationships, and practical steps to get started today. Tune in and discover how this gentle technique can empower you to take care of yourself, no matter what chaos surrounds you.

Book:
The Tapping Solution by Nick Ortner

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Enabling is a common yet often misunderstood behavior among the loved ones of addicts. In this episode, we dive into what enabling looks like, why it happens, and how it impacts both the addict and their family or friends. Through personal stories, insights, and practical tips, we’ll explore how to recognize enabling behaviors and shift toward healthier ways of offering support without sacrificing your well-being. Whether you're just beginning to understand this dynamic or looking for new strategies, this episode offers a compassionate and empowering perspective.

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In this episode, we explore the transformative power of positive reinforcement when supporting a loved one with addiction. Learn how small affirmations, encouragement, and focusing on progress—no matter how small—can foster trust, promote change, and strengthen your relationship. We’ll discuss practical tips, and real-life examples. Tune in to discover how positivity can be a powerful tool in your journey toward healing and hope.