Fi
A Memoir
Failed to add items
Add to Cart failed.
Add to Wish List failed.
Remove from wish list failed.
Follow podcast failed
Unfollow podcast failed
Buy Now for $22.26
No default payment method selected.
We are sorry. We are not allowed to sell this product with the selected payment method
-
Narrated by:
-
Alexandra Fuller
-
Written by:
-
Alexandra Fuller
About this listen
From the award-winning New York Times bestselling author, Alexandra Fuller, comes a career defining memoir about grieving the sudden loss of her twenty-one-year-old child
“Fair to say, I was in a ribald state the summer before my fiftieth birthday.” And so begins Alexandra Fuller’s open, vivid new memoir, Fi. It’s midsummer in Wyoming and Alexandra is barely hanging on. Grieving her father and pining for her home country of Zimbabwe, reeling from a midlife breakup, freshly sober and piecing her way uncertainly through a volatile new relationship with a younger woman, Alexandra vows to get herself back on even keel.
And then—suddenly and incomprehensibly—her son Fi, at twenty-one years old, dies in his sleep.
No stranger to loss—young siblings, a parent, a home country—Alexandra is nonetheless leveled. At the same time, she is painfully aware that she cannot succumb and abandon her two surviving daughters as her mother before her had done. From a sheep wagon deep in the mountains of Wyoming to a grief sanctuary in New Mexico to a silent meditation retreat in Alberta, Canada, Alexandra journeys up and down the spine of the Rocky Mountains in an attempt to find how to grieve herself whole. There is no answer, and there are countless answers—in poetry, in rituals and routines, in nature and in the indigenous wisdom she absorbed as a child in Zimbabwe. By turns disarming, devastating and—unexpectedly, blessedly funny, Alexandra recounts the wild medicine of painstakingly grieving a child in a culture that has no instructions for it.
©2024 Alexandra Fuller (P)2024 Recorded BooksYou may also enjoy...
-
Let's Pretend This Will Work
- A Novel
- Written by: Maddie Dawson
- Narrated by: Helen Laser
- Length: 10 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
After too many dates, thirtysomething Mimi Perkins is still single, unmoored, and longing for love. So when Ren Yardley—a handsome, divorced fellow drama teacher and single father—falls in love with her and proposes, she’s sure this is at last the good news her psychic predicted. Soon after proposing, Ren receives the devastating news that his ex-wife has been in a debilitating car accident, prompting him to temporarily move back into his former home to care for her and his daughters.
Written by: Maddie Dawson
-
Briefly Perfectly Human
- Making an Authentic Life by Getting Real About the End
- Written by: Alua Arthur
- Narrated by: Alua Arthur
- Length: 9 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
For her clients and everyone who has been inspired by her humanity, Alua Arthur is a friend at the end of the world. As our country’s leading death doula, she’s spreading a transformative message: thinking about your death—whether imminent or not—will breathe wild, new potential into your life. Warm, generous, and funny AF, Alua supports and helps manage end-of-life care on many levels. The business matters, medical directives, memorial planning; but also honoring the quiet moments, when monitors are beeping and loved ones have stepped out to get some air.
-
-
Great reminder to live!!
- By Minnelle on 2024-08-08
Written by: Alua Arthur
-
The Memory of Lavender and Sage
- Written by: Aimie K. Runyan
- Narrated by: Caroline Hewitt
- Length: 10 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Food critic Tempèsta Luddington has always felt like the odd person out in her family, ever since she lost her beloved mother at the tender age of thirteen. When her workaholic father passes fifteen years later, Tempèsta is not surprised that the majority of the considerable family money will pass to her dutiful younger brother, Wal. Still, she is left a modest remembrance from her mother, and for the first time Tempèsta has a world of choices before her.
-
-
Lovely, warm, comforting, hopeful
- By Georgina on 2024-08-20
Written by: Aimie K. Runyan
-
The Cemetery of Untold Stories
- Written by: Julia Alvarez
- Narrated by: Alma Cuervo
- Length: 8 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Alma Cruz, the celebrated writer at the heart of The Cemetery of Untold Stories, doesn’t want to end up like her friend, a novelist who fought so long and hard to finish a book that it threatened her sanity. So when Alma inherits a small plot of land in the Dominican Republic, her homeland, she has the beautiful idea of turning it into a place to bury her untold stories—literally. She creates a graveyard for the manuscript drafts and revisions, and the characters whose lives she tried and failed to bring to life and who still haunt her.
-
-
Creative and fresh
- By Joan M on 2024-08-16
Written by: Julia Alvarez
-
The Mango Tree
- A Memoir of Fruit, Florida, and Felony
- Written by: Annabelle Tometich
- Narrated by: Annabelle Tometich
- Length: 10 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
When journalist Annabelle Tometich picks up the phone one June morning, she isn’t expecting a collect call from an inmate at the Lee County Jail. And when she accepts, she certainly isn’t prepared to hear her mother’s voice on the other end of the line. However, explaining the situation to her younger siblings afterwards was easy; all she had to say was, “Mom shot at some guy. He was messing with her mangoes.” They immediately understood.
-
-
authentic and honest.
- By anne nonomus on 2024-11-17
Written by: Annabelle Tometich
-
Dream
- The Art and Science of Slumber
- Written by: Scott Carney
- Narrated by: Scott Carney
- Length: 3 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Why do so many of us have trouble falling asleep? Why do our thoughts spin in wild directions after dark? More important: why do we dream? In this groundbreaking new book, investigative journalist and anthropologist Scott Carney sets out to discover how the sleeping world reverberates in the waking one. Unlock the power of the immune system at the same time you dig deeply into the source of creativity. Discover the evolutionary process that forges both memory and emotions.
-
-
What an eye opener!
- By Chariotmaker on 2024-08-08
Written by: Scott Carney
-
Let's Pretend This Will Work
- A Novel
- Written by: Maddie Dawson
- Narrated by: Helen Laser
- Length: 10 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
After too many dates, thirtysomething Mimi Perkins is still single, unmoored, and longing for love. So when Ren Yardley—a handsome, divorced fellow drama teacher and single father—falls in love with her and proposes, she’s sure this is at last the good news her psychic predicted. Soon after proposing, Ren receives the devastating news that his ex-wife has been in a debilitating car accident, prompting him to temporarily move back into his former home to care for her and his daughters.
Written by: Maddie Dawson
-
Briefly Perfectly Human
- Making an Authentic Life by Getting Real About the End
- Written by: Alua Arthur
- Narrated by: Alua Arthur
- Length: 9 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
For her clients and everyone who has been inspired by her humanity, Alua Arthur is a friend at the end of the world. As our country’s leading death doula, she’s spreading a transformative message: thinking about your death—whether imminent or not—will breathe wild, new potential into your life. Warm, generous, and funny AF, Alua supports and helps manage end-of-life care on many levels. The business matters, medical directives, memorial planning; but also honoring the quiet moments, when monitors are beeping and loved ones have stepped out to get some air.
-
-
Great reminder to live!!
- By Minnelle on 2024-08-08
Written by: Alua Arthur
-
The Memory of Lavender and Sage
- Written by: Aimie K. Runyan
- Narrated by: Caroline Hewitt
- Length: 10 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Food critic Tempèsta Luddington has always felt like the odd person out in her family, ever since she lost her beloved mother at the tender age of thirteen. When her workaholic father passes fifteen years later, Tempèsta is not surprised that the majority of the considerable family money will pass to her dutiful younger brother, Wal. Still, she is left a modest remembrance from her mother, and for the first time Tempèsta has a world of choices before her.
-
-
Lovely, warm, comforting, hopeful
- By Georgina on 2024-08-20
Written by: Aimie K. Runyan
-
The Cemetery of Untold Stories
- Written by: Julia Alvarez
- Narrated by: Alma Cuervo
- Length: 8 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Alma Cruz, the celebrated writer at the heart of The Cemetery of Untold Stories, doesn’t want to end up like her friend, a novelist who fought so long and hard to finish a book that it threatened her sanity. So when Alma inherits a small plot of land in the Dominican Republic, her homeland, she has the beautiful idea of turning it into a place to bury her untold stories—literally. She creates a graveyard for the manuscript drafts and revisions, and the characters whose lives she tried and failed to bring to life and who still haunt her.
-
-
Creative and fresh
- By Joan M on 2024-08-16
Written by: Julia Alvarez
-
The Mango Tree
- A Memoir of Fruit, Florida, and Felony
- Written by: Annabelle Tometich
- Narrated by: Annabelle Tometich
- Length: 10 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
When journalist Annabelle Tometich picks up the phone one June morning, she isn’t expecting a collect call from an inmate at the Lee County Jail. And when she accepts, she certainly isn’t prepared to hear her mother’s voice on the other end of the line. However, explaining the situation to her younger siblings afterwards was easy; all she had to say was, “Mom shot at some guy. He was messing with her mangoes.” They immediately understood.
-
-
authentic and honest.
- By anne nonomus on 2024-11-17
Written by: Annabelle Tometich
-
Dream
- The Art and Science of Slumber
- Written by: Scott Carney
- Narrated by: Scott Carney
- Length: 3 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Why do so many of us have trouble falling asleep? Why do our thoughts spin in wild directions after dark? More important: why do we dream? In this groundbreaking new book, investigative journalist and anthropologist Scott Carney sets out to discover how the sleeping world reverberates in the waking one. Unlock the power of the immune system at the same time you dig deeply into the source of creativity. Discover the evolutionary process that forges both memory and emotions.
-
-
What an eye opener!
- By Chariotmaker on 2024-08-08
Written by: Scott Carney
-
Song of the Sparrow
- A Memoir
- Written by: Tara MacLean
- Narrated by: Tara MacLean
- Length: 10 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Singer/songwriter Tara MacLean has had an extraordinary musical career. From being discovered singing on a BC ferry to touring with Dido, Tom Cochrane and Lilith Fair, her solo albums and those with the band Shaye have touched legions of fans. But she hasn’t, until now, disclosed the details of how the power of song saved her from a childhood filled with danger.
-
-
A MUST read (listen!)
- By Yougotsarah on 2023-06-27
Written by: Tara MacLean
-
The Lost Letters of Aisling
- A Novel
- Written by: Cynthia Ellingsen
- Narrated by: Aoife McMahon, Stephanie Cannon
- Length: 9 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Rainey’s grandmother makes a startling request: Take me home. To Ireland, the country she fled post-World War II. Though they’re inseparably close, Rainey knows few of her grandmother’s secrets. Until they arrive at Aisling—the majestic estate on the southern coast of Ireland where her grandmother was raised—and Rainey discovers a collection of seventy-year-old letters in a trunk.
-
-
Lovely story!!
- By Nouhade N. on 2024-11-13
Written by: Cynthia Ellingsen
-
Truth Telling
- Seven Conversations About Indigenous Life in Canada
- Written by: Michelle Good
- Narrated by: Megan Tooley
- Length: 4 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
With authority and insight, Truth Telling examines a wide range of Indigenous issues framed by Michelle Good’s personal experience and knowledge. From racism, broken treaties, and cultural pillaging, to the value of Indigenous lives and the importance of Indigenous literature, this collection reveals facts about Indigenous life in Canada that are both devastating and enlightening.
-
-
Excellent information
- By Deborah E Harcus on 2023-06-15
Written by: Michelle Good
-
Ordinary Human Failings
- A Novel
- Written by: Megan Nolan
- Narrated by: Jessica Regan
- Length: 5 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
It's 1990 in London and Tom Hargreaves has it all: a burgeoning career as a reporter, fierce ambition and a brisk disregard for the "peasants"—ordinary people, his readers, easy tabloid fodder. His star seems set to rise when he stumbles across a sensational scoop: a dead child on a London estate, grieving parents beloved across the neighborhood, and the finger of suspicion pointing at one reclusive family of Irish immigrants and “bad apples”: the Greens. At their heart sits Carmel: beautiful, otherworldly, broken, and once destined for a future beyond her circumstances.
-
-
The characters came to life as their stories unfolded.
- By Amazon Customer on 2024-09-17
Written by: Megan Nolan
-
Under the Paper Moon
- Written by: Shaina Steinberg
- Narrated by: Carrie Coello
- Length: 8 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
It's 1942, and as far as her father knows, Evelyn Bishop, heiress to an aeronautics fortune, is working as a translator in London. In truth, Evelyn—daring, beautiful, and as adept with a rifle as she is in five languages—has joined the Office of Strategic Services as a spy. Her goal is personal: to find her brother, who is being held as a POW in a Nazi labor camp. Through one high-risk mission after another, she is paired with the reckless and rebellious Nick Gallagher, growing ever close to him until the war's end brings with it an act of deep betrayal.
-
-
anachronistic almost to the point of ridulous
- By Tiffany on 2024-11-15
Written by: Shaina Steinberg
-
Tripping on Utopia
- Margaret Mead, the Cold War, and the Troubled Birth of Psychedelic Science
- Written by: Benjamin Breen
- Narrated by: Suzanne Toren
- Length: 12 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
A bold and brilliant revisionist take on the history of psychedelics in the twentieth century, illuminating how a culture of experimental drugs shaped the Cold War and the birth of Silicon Valley....
Written by: Benjamin Breen
-
Someone You Know
- An Unforgettable Collection of Canadian True Crime Stories
- Written by: Catherine Fogarty
- Narrated by: Jennifer Blom
- Length: 9 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Someone You Know is an anthology of twelve unforgettable Canadian true-crime stories by Story Hunter podcast producer, host and writer Catherine Fogarty. Each story reveals the haunting truth and statistical reality that a person is more likely to be murdered by someone they know than by a stranger. And while “stranger danger” is often the stuff of our nightmares and Hollywood horror films, sometimes those who are closest to us are even more dangerous than strangers.
-
-
Heart-wrenching true crime stories
- By Arshdeep Arora on 2024-12-14
Written by: Catherine Fogarty
-
Take the Long Way Home
- Written by: Rochelle Alers
- Narrated by: Jasmin Walker
- Length: 15 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Freedom fighter, brilliant businessperson, devoted wife, master of languages, and ultimately, savior of a European dynasty. Claudia Patterson would become all of these—spurred on by the fiercely powerful loves and losses along the way … Denny Clark. An abused thirteen-year-old White boy whose life twelve-year-old Claudia saves—complicating her own life for years to come.
Written by: Rochelle Alers
-
The Wife You Know
- Written by: Chad Zunker
- Narrated by: Thor Knai, Helen Laser
- Length: 6 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Widower Luke Driskell didn’t expect to fall in love and marry again so quickly. But Ashley and her daughter, Joy, are special—a quality borne out when Ashley rushes into a burning day-care center to save the children. Immediately she’s a social media sensation and hero. Then, just as suddenly, Ashley and Joy disappear into the bitterly cold night. With no trace of their whereabouts, Luke begins a panicked investigation. Alarmingly, he can find no proof that the woman he loves even exists. Left behind: just a hidden stash of fake IDs. Different names. Different cities. Same haunted face.
-
-
Would not recommend
- By Private on 2024-09-11
Written by: Chad Zunker
-
Divine Might
- Goddesses in Greek Myth
- Written by: Natalie Haynes
- Narrated by: Natalie Haynes
- Length: 9 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Few writers today have reshaped our view of the ancient Greek myths more than revered bestselling author Natalie Haynes. Divine Might is a female-centered look at Olympus and the Furies, focusing on the goddesses whose prowess, passions, jealousies, and desires rival those of their male kin.
-
-
Loved it!
- By Kirsty Phillips on 2024-01-18
Written by: Natalie Haynes
-
Olivetti
- Written by: Allie Millington
- Narrated by: Christopher Gebauer, Simon Vance
- Length: 4 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Being a typewriter is not as easy as it looks. Surrounded by books (notorious attention hogs) and recently replaced by a computer, Olivetti has been forgotten by the Brindles—the family he’s lived with for years. The Brindles are busy humans, apart from twelve-year-old Ernest, who would rather be left alone with his collection of Oxford English Dictionaries. Once a collector of words, now Olivetti only collects dust. He gets a rare glimpse of action from Ernest’s mom, Beatrice—his used-to-be frequent visitor—only for her to drop him off at Heartland Pawn Shop and leave him behind.
-
-
Lovely book!
- By Dreaaa on 2024-07-28
Written by: Allie Millington
-
The Almost Widow
- A Novel
- Written by: Gail Anderson-Dargatz
- Narrated by: Erin Bennett
- Length: 8 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Someone is watching Piper, and she thinks she knows who it is: the bushman. But there’s more than one danger lurking in this temperate rainforest. Poachers are taking down old growth trees and jeopardizing plans for a park, a project Piper is passionate about. When she pressures her husband, Ben, a natural resources officer, to identify the culprits, he takes his drone into the wilderness to track them down. And then, just as a snowstorm hits, he goes missing.
-
-
So many reasons why this is simply bad
- By LoveMyBOOKS on 2024-10-01
Written by: Gail Anderson-Dargatz