Marriages rarely fall apart because of one big moment—they erode through small daily disconnections.

In this episode, Dan sits down with author Lindsay Maestes to talk about how couples can rebuild connection, overcome sexual shame, and create a stronger marriage through intentional daily habits.

They discuss faith and sexuality, emotional labor, foreplay outside the bedroom, and why openness and vulnerability are essential for great intimacy.

Plus, Lindsay shares a fun "black belt" sex tip to help couples add novelty and excitement to their relationship.

Resources and Events:

We invite you to explore our Get Your Marriage On coaching program. For a limited time, you can try it free for 30 days and get access to coaching sessions and our full course library.

We also have an opening due to a cancellation at our upcoming couples retreat, and one more spot available on our cruise! We'd love to have you join us!

Disclaimer: The opinions and values expressed by guests on the Get Your Marriage On! podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the opinions and values of the host. Appearance on the podcast does not imply an endorsement of the guest or their products by Get Your Marriage On or its host. While we work hard to bring you quality and valuable content, listeners are encouraged to use their own best judgment in applying the information or products discussed on this podcast.

In this episode, I sit down with my friend Jacqlin — published author and romance reader — to talk about something I've wanted to explore for a long time: how writing intimate stories can deepen connection in marriage.

We talk about:

• Why erotic writing can feel more vulnerable than sex

• The difference between sharing your body and sharing your private thoughts

• How to overcome fear of rejection

• Practical scaffolding and ideas for writing your first spicy story

• Boundaries, motivation, and what NOT to do

• Why your "why" matters more than the spice level

Jacqlin even shares a sample story at the end of the episode (with a content warning), so you can hear how tenderness and connection can coexist with passion.

If you've ever wondered:

• Where do I even start?

• Is this appropriate in marriage?

• What if my spouse rejects it?

• Could this actually bring us closer?

This episode will give you clarity and courage.

Sex isn't just about bodies. It's about inviting your spouse into the private parts of your mind and heart.

And that can be transformative.

👉 Download the Intimately Us app for access to more stories like this.
👉 Join us on the Get Your Marriage On Cruise this October.
👉 Try our coaching program free for 30 days.

👉 Snag the last-minute opening for our Spring Couples Retreat.

In this bonus Q&A episode, I tackle some of the most vulnerable and complex sexual questions couples are asking right now.

We talk about:

• Anal play and whether certain acts are morally wrong

• Masturbation inside marriage — especially when your spouse is available

• What to do when teasing doesn't lead to follow-through

• How to talk dirty without feeling dirty

• Stepping into sexual confidence when your spouse wants more intensity

• Low desire that won't budge — even after trying everything

• And the painful dynamic of feeling like you're never "enough"

Here's the core principle:
Sex acts themselves are often neutral. What matters is the fruit they produce in your marriage.

Is it building trust? Intimacy? Freedom? Playfulness?
Or is it creating shame, pressure, resentment, or disconnection?

This episode will help you think more deeply, talk more honestly, and navigate your sexual relationship with maturity and integrity.

If you want deeper support, don't forget to check out the Get Your Marriage On Program — including our coaching community and 30-day free trial.

Mentioned in the episode:

Get Your Marriage On Dirty Talk Guide (From Awkward to Arousing: A Guide to "Dirty Talk" for Christians)

Episode #91: How to Talk Dirty Without Feeling Dirty or Awkward

SPECIAL OPPORTUNITY: Someone cancelled and now we have a spot open for you at our previously sold out spring retreat! Grab it now before it's gone!

Shame is a universal emotion — and for many Christians, sexual shame is one of the hardest to overcome.

In this deeply honest conversation, I'm joined by Natalie Hamblin as we explore how sexual shame quietly divides marriages, and how couples can move toward sexual wholeness instead.

We talk about:

• How shame creates emotional and physical distance

• Why hiding parts of yourself fractures intimacy

• The difference between guilt and shame

• How faith and sexuality actually belong together

• How to reframe sex as God-given and good

• What to do if shame from your past is haunting your present marriage

• The power of education and communication

• And how Natalie and her husband moved from fear to deep connection

And if sexual shame is something you're actively working through, I invite you to explore our Get Your Marriage On coaching program. For a limited time, you can try it free for 30 days and get access to coaching sessions and our full course library.

We also have an opening due to a cancellation at our upcoming couples retreat! We'd love to have you join us!

Disclaimer: The opinions and values expressed by guests on the Get Your Marriage On! podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the opinions and values of the host. Appearance on the podcast does not imply an endorsement of the guest or their products by Get Your Marriage On or its host. While we work hard to bring you quality and valuable content, listeners are encouraged to use their own best judgment in applying the information or products discussed on this podcast.

In this special Bonus Q&A episode, Dan answers real questions from married couples about oral sex — from first-time nerves to performance anxiety, from orgasm struggles to emotional hangups.

If you grew up in a home where sex was taboo…
If you feel awkward, anxious, or unsure how to talk about this…
If you're craving more connection but feel stuck…

This episode is for you.

Topics Dan addresses:

• Feeling nervous about trying oral sex for the first time
• Why orgasm anxiety can sabotage pleasure
• "Why won't she kiss me after?"
• Mixed feelings about disgust and desire
• When one spouse wants more reciprocity
• How resentment quietly builds in intimacy

If you have anonymous questions, join our private Facebook group:
Christian Couples Improving Intimacy in Marriage

Or submit a question on our website.

And don't forget — the Intimacy Sea Cruise (October 4–10) is almost full. Apply now at getyourmarriageon.com

(If you haven't listened to Part 1 yet, go back. It lays the foundation for everything we're about to discuss.)

Because in Part 2, we get real . . .

In this continuation of my conversation with Charlene Byers, we explore:

• Why honesty is the foundation of erotic intimacy

• What integrity looks like in marriage

• What gets you stuck in roommate syndrome and resentment

• The "losing strategies" couples use without realizing it

We also talk about small daily habits that simmer connection and how to rebuild intimacy when things feel distant.

This one might stretch you—in a good way.

And it'll give you language and motivation to start the conversations that lead to better connection (in and out of the bedroom).

Resources and Events

• Don't miss this amazing opportunity to love and make love with your spouse better, TONIGHT! Next Level Loving: A Virtual Intimacy Getaway (Feb 13-14): https://getyourmarriageon.com/next-levels-virtual-lovemaking-retreat
• Intimately Us & Just Between Us apps: https://getyourmarriageon.com/our-apps/
• Get Your Marriage On Coaching Program: https://getyourmarriageon.com/program/
• Get Your Marriage On Cruise: https://getyourmarriageon.com/cruise/
• We had a cancellation for our retreat in the spring! Snatch this spot while you can! https://getyourmarriageon.com/couples-retreat/

Disclaimer: The opinions and values expressed by guests on the Get Your Marriage On! podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the opinions and values of the host. Appearance on the podcast does not imply an endorsement of the guest or their products by Get Your Marriage On or its host. While we work hard to bring you quality and valuable content, listeners are encouraged to use their own best judgment in applying the information or products discussed on this podcast.

We don't just want sex.

We want sexual experiences that move us.
We want to walk out of the bedroom different than when we walked in.

But somewhere along the way, sex can become… predictable. Scripted. Routine.

In Part 1 of my guest appearance on Charlene Byers's podcast, we cover the following:

• The truth about sexual desire discrepancy (and why it's not a problem)

• How performance pressure quietly kills connection

• Two different reasons we give pleasure, and why one of them doesn't work

• What men and women are most turned on by

• What men and women are turned off by

You'll also hear one of my own vulnerable marriage missteps and what it taught me about anxiety, meaning-making, and true intimacy.

👉 In Part 2, we go deeper into honesty, integrity, and the hard conversations that create real intimacy. Don't miss it.

Resources and Events

• Don't miss this amazing opportunity to love and make love with your spouse better, TONIGHT! Next Level Loving: A Virtual Intimacy Getaway (Feb 13-14): https://getyourmarriageon.com/next-levels-virtual-lovemaking-retreat
• Intimately Us & Just Between Us apps: https://getyourmarriageon.com/our-apps/
• Get Your Marriage On Coaching Program: https://getyourmarriageon.com/program/
• Get Your Marriage On Cruise: https://getyourmarriageon.com/cruise/
• We had a cancellation for our retreat in the spring! Snatch this spot while you can! https://getyourmarriageon.com/couples-retreat/

Disclaimer: The opinions and values expressed by guests on the Get Your Marriage On! podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the opinions and values of the host. Appearance on the podcast does not imply an endorsement of the guest or their products by Get Your Marriage On or its host. While we work hard to bring you quality and valuable content, listeners are encouraged to use their own best judgment in applying the information or products discussed on this podcast.

 With Valentine's Day, just around the corner, I've been thinking a lot about what does it mean to really love my wife, and to love well?

In this bonus episode, we pulled a favorite clip from our archive with Jennifer Finlayson-Fife, therapist-turned-coach, longtime mentor, and returning guest on the podcast, in which we asked her: "What does it mean to cherish your spouse?"

Her answer is thoughtful, wise, actionable, and hopeful as she teaches how to build truly loving marriages.

Resources and Events

• Don't miss this amazing opportunity to love and make love with your spouse better! Next Level Loving: A Virtual Intimacy Getaway (Feb 13-14): https://getyourmarriageon.com/next-levels-virtual-lovemaking-retreat
• Intimately Us & Just Between Us apps (Valentine's Intimacy Challenge started on Feb 1!): https://getyourmarriageon.com/our-apps/
• Get Your Marriage On Coaching Program: https://getyourmarriageon.com/program/
• Get Your Marriage On Cruise: https://getyourmarriageon.com/cruise/
• We had a cancellation for our retreat in the spring! Snatch this spot while you can! https://getyourmarriageon.com/couples-retreat/

Disclaimer: The opinions and values expressed by guests on the Get Your Marriage On! podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the opinions and values of the host. Appearance on the podcast does not imply an endorsement of the guest or their products by Get Your Marriage On or its host. While we work hard to bring you quality and valuable content, listeners are encouraged to use their own best judgment in applying the information or products discussed on this podcast.